Sunday, 21 June 2020
Decided to come back here after a LONG LONG hiatus!
I can hear all your screams and shouts already! :D Hehe
It's quite.. interesting
Recently I've been dreaming a lot about Nanyang
About going back to the school
and just roaming around talking to people
Probably a part of me really misses those days T.T
Then yesterday while praying I just remembered this blog
and started reading all the posts
I couldn't stop reading till 7am in the morning HAHA ;D
my heart was so warm just reading everything
About how we loved our teachers
how we loved each other
how we just laughed and hugged and cried together :')
I was so happy that my secondary school days were like that
and really thankful that many beautiful things
and many beautiful thoughts were recorded here
Loved how 16 year old Jermia
was someone who loved life
saw the good in everyone
and just lived the life the way she wanted
without thinking much about how others perceived her
9 years have passed.. and 9 years is a long long time
Recently we had a worship night
we sang to the song Glorified
and was tearing non stop while worshipping ;O
It was one of the first few Christian songs that I learnt
It is a song that I sang through many many seasons of my life
While worshipping it struck me that
seasons changed
and I have changed
The person who taught me this song has left
many things happened
and some people left
probably in the process
I got fearful of pouring my heart out
started to second guess
and entertain many "I'm not good enough" thoughts
But God has always remained the same throughout :')
And I decided that what was most precious about me
should continue to be part of me :)
So here is 25 year old Jermia (OMG SOUNDS OLD HALP)
According to my past blog posts
I'm supposed to be married at 长城
but nope it's not going to happen anytime soon HAHA xD
25 year old Jermia is now working
There are days (many days in fact :P)
when I would struggle to get out of bed
and dread what is ahead :X
But I'm going to decide to love life :)
I'm living amongst grown-ups (like me) now
Successful ambitious driven
Insecure prideful fearful
I'm going to decide to always see the best in people :)
I carry roles and responsibilities
And with these come expectations
I'm going to decide to be driven by love
and not by fear of not being good enough
Yup people, this is my quarter life crisis post
And from here on
I'm going to step into the best years of my life ;D!
P/S: Hello 16 year old Jermia
25 year old Jerms misses you so much :')
I'm not going to strive to become like you
I'm going to be even better ;)
Jermia hopped off at 00:06